9 posts tagged “self-help”

I've been sick since Saturday - I left the retreat I was on briefly, but returned.  I haven't posted this week because I've just been really out of it.  I wanted to share with you some of the writing I did on my retreat.  I led a writing workshop on Body Image.  The following was written there.

Dear Body,

I love you and like you exactly as you are today.  You are a vessel that gets me through my days and nights.  You carry my soul.  I love your smooth skin and your long limbs.  I love your hair and your eyes.  I love that you've adapted to suit all of my addictions.  When I ate too much, you stretched your skin for me, even though it left nasty marks.  When I got abstinent, you shed the excess weight as best as you could.  I love that you've carried me around for 37 years without much complaint.  I'm sorry for the abuse I put you through, both physical and mental.  I'm sorry for not listening to your cues in so many areas like hearing you say, "I'm full," or "We should rest," and completely ignoring you.  Thank you for not failing me even though by all rights, you probably should have.  Dear Body, please forgive me.

We only had about 15 minutes to write and this was the second part of what I wrote, so it's somewhat incomplete. I'll have to finish it one day.

My body has been telling me all week that I'm not getting enough sleep.  And I have been ignoring it - relentlessly.  I am so tired during the day and then get invigorated around 10pm every night.  Well, invigorated might be a strong word.  But, I get less sleepy around that time and end up staying up too late once again.  It's a vicious cycle.  I am really glad tomorrow is Friday and I'm going away on retreat because I know I'll have a chance to rest and catch up on my sleep. 

Beyond this weekend, though, I need to address this.  I need to get to bed earlier. I can't run myself down like this - it's not physically or mentally healthy. I've been noticing I haven't been taken my inner commitments as seriously as I used to.  I give myself leeway and permission to not do my step work or have quiet prayer and meditation time - in essence I make excuses, really.

I love that I'm noticing all these "great" things right before I go away - at least I know I won't have a lack of things to work on while I'm there. 

I go on ra spiritual etreat tomorrow night for the weekend.  Ive been looking forward to this for months because it is always just such a good time.  For some reason, I am not as excited about going this time.  I've been thinking about how much I'll miss my daily routine and family life.  I'm going to miss the puppy, the kids, the husband.  I miss the kids and the husband whenever we're apart, though, and I believe absence does make the heart grow fonder - so what is it about this time that is different?

I sure hope it's not because I'm getting set in my ways as I get older.  I think it's dangerous to get into any sort of set routine where life becomes monotonous and as I write this... I'm realizing how much this resembles my life lately.  I like having my little habits and ways that are oh-so-familiar to me.  Anything that breaks the cycle throws me off.  When did this happen? It had to be sometime within the fall and winter since we were still moving into the new house over the summer.  So, it's a recent development - that's good, I think.

It looks like retreat is coming just at the right time for me, whether I believe so or think I'm ready for it or not.

You know I'm a big advocate of the 12 steps. I think everyone could benefit from using them.  The problem is, not everyone is an addict or friend of an addict (although, the majority of people do fall into at least one of those categories, not everyone is aware of it).   Now, even though I'm a fan of that particular way of life, it doesn't mean that I'm not open minded to other solutions.

I came across a concept today that is pretty darn revolutionary.  It's the Theory of Everything, or Flucidity - The "Secret of Life" that anyone can make use of.  Flucidity's basic premise states that everything that exists is one of four types of things in the universe: Representation, Potential Energy, Measurement and Structure, and Interaction and Association.  Using Flucidity, it is suggested that anything is possible using the Flucidity model pictured below - since everything exists in one of four categories and we can map paths to all of them with this model.

It really is a mind-blowing concept - I'm certainly intrigued! I need to study this more to fully understand and grasp it, but I intend to try out the philosophies suggested in their "How it Works" section to see for myself how powerful this can be.

Disclosed

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years of trying to get other people interested in you.
--Dale Carnegie

I love that quote.  It really is true that the more involved and concerned we are about others, the less concerned we are about ourselves, and in general, the happier we become.  It's amazing how much happier I am when I'm not focusing on myself all the time.  It's nice to realize the world doesn't revolve around me.   And again with the paradoxes - even if I try this with selfish motives at first (wanting people to like me), if I truly apply this principal, the end result is that I'm happier with myself and no longer seek the praises of everyone else. 

I recently happened upon a drug detox site that piqued my interest.  It's called Meditox and basically it's a method along with a drug that gets you over the withdrawal symptoms of opiate addiction & dependency quickly, with one of their services being methadone detox.  They are distinguishing themselves from other treatment programs by their speed of recovery - boasting no more 30, 60, 90 day rehab stays.

My initial reaction was one of suspicion and condemnation. How could they claim to cure or even help an addict in that short of a time period? I don't believe that recovery from any type of addiction is something that can happen over night or even in a week.  Sure, the physical addiction symptoms might go away, but the disease of addiction is so much more powerful than just a physical manifestation.  I believe the disease is emotional and spiritual as well.  Addicts will continue to use their drug of choice if the underlying emotional and spiritual issues are not addressed.  I've seen it happen again and again and again, sadly.

However, after some discussions with the good folks over at Meditox, I was educated about what their methods really are. First of all, they don't treat "regular" drug addicts or alcoholics. Their real audience are actually people who have been taking prescription meds for a length of time and are afraid to stop taking them because of the withdrawal symptoms. Meditox helps people to withdraw physically from opiates and pain meds without the awful, debilitating pain that can go with it. Afterwards, the patients are counseled and set up to go to therapy and/or 12-step programs to continue their recovery. And that's definitely something I can stand behind.

Another equally important factor in staying healthy is going to the doctor on a regular basis.  (duh!)  However, with the healthcare crisis this nation is currently experiencing, more and more people are going without healthcare coverage.  That's pretty scary... and sad, too.  I know my health insurance provided through work is not the best plan out there and it's also expensive.  We pay over $500 per month for a family of four. 

Here is something that could be very helpful for all of us with undesirable healthcare options:  Vimo.  Vimo is a price comparison search engine for all venues of healthcare, from HMOs and HSAs to doctors and dentists.  There are more than 3,500 plans in their database right now to choose from.

The way it works is you enter your criteria that is important and relevant to you and then the insurance plans that fit your needs will be displayed.  When you have narrowed it down to a few that seem like the best options, then you can drill down and see very specific details about those plans and see exactly what type of coverage those plans offer.   From there, you can start the process of choosing a plan. 

Even if you get very minimal coverage, it would be better than having none at all - and you never know when you're going to need to see a doctor for any reason.  I believe having a health plan provides not only security for your well-being, but peace of mind for your sanity, knowing you've got a safety net just in case.  There is a lot to be said for the influence of the mind on the ailments of the body.

I stumbled upon this site last week and was very intrigued.  It's called The Action Principles  and by following these simple suggestions, they promise to bring peace and prosperity into your life.  I like this site because much of what is written here is embodied in the 12-steps, principles that I already live by.  I do have a great deal of peace and prosperity in my life today and I can only attribute them to how I live now compared to the past.  Worth a read!

I'm tired today... I stayed up too late watching Monday Night Football.  It was worth it since we beat the pants off the Packers, as expected, but still - being tired is not a good thing for me.

You might have heard of the acronym HALT - it stands for Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired.   And it's used to say - watch out for any or all of those things as they can be triggers to old behavior.   Tired is definitely a big trigger for me.  When I'm tired, I am more inclined to delve into self-pity and wonder why the world is not stopping for me.  Being tired lends itself to being lazier where everything is concerned: work, interacting with people, my food plan.   I know on days when I haven't gotten enough rest the night before, I have to be extremely diligent. 

Where my food is concerned, I have to really be careful and make sure I use the food scale and measuring cups and make wise choices.  I'm more apt to pick things that are more traditionally comfort-type foods when I'm not well rested and that's not always a safe place to be in for me.  I need to remember that no matter what I eat, it's not going to change the fact that I went to bed too late and am walking around like a zombie!

When interacting with people on days like these, I have to be on guard of my sharp tongue.  I've got a razor sharp wit that has been known to cut people in two in the past.  I choose to keep those thoughts to myself today instead of verbalizing them - for the most part! Restraint of tongue and pen are the watchwords for me today.  It's like - if I don't feel good, I don't want any one to feel good, damn it!  Pretty mean and self-centered, no?  But it's the truth.

And now if only I had some practical solutions on being more concerned with my work habits on tired days.  Ahhh, this whole journey is a process - I'll get there one day.  :-)